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Joke of the week:  Howlers (Part 2)

Q "What is the benefit to the fish of producing only a small volume of urine ?"
A "Otherwise they would have to keep on stopping."

Oil pollution has been a major academic in the last couple of years.

Farmers use intoxicating chemicals.

The plants crow rapidly because of the fertilisers.

The Rhine is very intoxicated indeed by the time it reaches Holland.

In the past century we have been polluting the atmosphere with Man's great scientific achievements. earosols

Air-conditioners ... rise to the top of the atmosphere.

In factory farming animals' foetus and urine are washed ... into rivers and lakes.

Q: How do we know the population in GB in 5000 BC?
A: From church records

We are stuck in a viscous circle.

The contraction phase of heartbeat: sisterly

A burglar alarm is similar to a hedgehog.

Q: Why do brewers never run short of yeast?
A: They kill themselves in their waste product, alcohol.

Q: Name a useful fungus.
A: Any poisonous one, it gets you off school.

Q: Name a disease caused by a virus.
A: TB (I can't spell tuberculoses)
A: rabbis.

Q: What was the traditional purpose of yogurt making?
A: So the biochemists could show off.

Q: Name two products that can be made when yeast is used.
A: milk and beer
A: bear and win.

Plants photosynthesise by chromatography

Most of the balloons inflated but mine didn't. There could have been a leek in it.

If more sulphur dioxide is put into the atmosphere deserts will become popular.

Blood sugar is kept at a metaphoric level.

The elbow joint is literally put and stuck together by a nail.

Suggest a possible reason why was the population of Britain rising in 50 BC.... because the Romans were starting to slaughter all the people because there was news of a baby king. Herod got angry and started to kill everyone. So people started to reproduce so the whole population would not be wiped out.

Q: What is meant by the gestation of a baby?
A: It is the time between contraception and birth.

England is able to prevent rabies because it is an island. For example if there were a rapid dog in France it could walk quite freely to Spain or even Portugal.

Q: What are the dangers of DDT?
A: Piousness

Q: Why is soil made more fertile by growing peas, beans or clover?
A: Because these plants restore the soil by talking.

Q: Why does spraying oil on the surface of water destroy mosquito larvae?
A: It evaporates them.

Q: Why does detergent destroy mosquito larvae?
A: It makes their little hands become undone.

Q: How would you protect yourself against malaria?
A: I would have a polo injection.

Q: Name two diseases caused by viruses.
A: Addis, Herbies.

As the heart beats faster, the blood vessels move faster round the body.

When a hydrogen atom loses an electron it becomes a protein.

Q: Name a way of being infected with HIV and how to reduce the risk
A: Injecting drugs with a used needle; use a condom

Q: Give a harmful effect of excess alcohol consumption
A It will make you hallucinogenic